my heart is broken

this is such a sad post. my sister has some friends, Leigh and Dayne who i have know pretty much as long as she has. however they live in austin so i don't see them much. they are about the funniest people i have ever met. they should have been a comedy act b/c they play off each other like nothing i have ever seen. for years they have been trying to have a baby. after years of trying and nothing, they decided to try invitro. well leigh's eggs were just not working. so they "borrowed" someone elses. (btw makes me so want to give up my eggs). they got pregnant!!! so excited!!! saw them in march when i was in austin. my sister and i went to have lunch with them. leigh was glowing. really!!! like she had a person carrying a light to shine on her. it was so awesome to see her like that! (forget the grackles) and i was so privileged to be one of the few people who found out the name! DASH!!! HOW AWESOME! in april leigh was delivered of a beautiful, healthy boy!! i found out today, that he died on saturday. ( my heart is wrenching just typing this!!!!!!!) dayne was changing his diaper and he went stiff then limp. leigh ran next door where an OB lives. he could not find a pulse. Dash was gone. how is this possible!!!!????!!! how can a couple who has only wanted to be parents for years, have to go through something like this? im sobbing. my heart hurts so much for them. i don't know what to say or do.

i do know i have a God who loves and has that sweet baby in his arms right now. i can't understand. but i can pray for the peace that passes all understanding. please pray with me for this couple who is going through the worst pain i'm sure a person can go through.

The Pinterest Project Hit or Miss Monday

so my friend miranda, and her friend jamie, over at http://pinterest-project.blogspot.com/ do a super fun thing called hit or miss monday. they wanted to know what mine were so here they are!

my hit...



and my miss...



i don't even know what to say about this. it's so disturbing on so many levels....

i ♥ my boys!

so last night the fam watched Diary of a Wimpy Kid Rodrick Rules. mikey and i have already seen it but i thought it was worth watching again. and i was right! Greg is the middle brother and is constantly picked on my his big brother and blamed for everything his little brother does. really my issue is the big brother Rodrick. he really is a jerk. he is mean to Greg in so many ways. and just watching that movie made me realize how blessed i am with my boys. don't get me wrong. they do have their moments. but for the most part, they really love and respect each other. during the movie caleb got into the big blue chair and within 15 minutes mikey was right there next to him. they stayed that way thru the whole movie. just hanging. loved it! i really hope and pray that they will continue to be close their whole lives

which makes me want to say sorry to my sis for constantly beating her up. sorry melissa! i'm glad you were able to get over that and that we can be such great friends.

here's a clip of the movie. it really is great! not just for kids!!

why oh why???

why oh why do i let other people get me down? i have some "friends" at church. but i guess they aren't really friends. if i only see them once a week and on FB i'm thinking that doesn't actually make them my friend. but i thought they were. tried to make a coffee date with one of them and found out she went and had coffee with another "friend". just makes me so mad. am i not worthy of coffee????? am i too needy???? when am i going to get over my self doubt? when am i EVER going to see my true worth??? why do i CARE what people think of me??? (why do i use more than one ???) i am a great friend. and if they can't see that them screw them. i live with all males. i need some time with females. to just talk about girl stuff. oh not have to hear guitars, loud music, sports, or pokemon. so i'm upset. i unfriended them. and several other "friends".

i guess mikey's "stomach" issues are getting me down. b/c he won't let me leave him, i have had to skip book club, date night and just some me time. i know it will pass but man! separation anxiety at 8? uggh!

i really have very little to complain about. co-op started and i just love going! there are some super fabulous women in there that i just adore and make me want to become a better person. michael is working!! and i got job teaching elementary anatomy and physiology once a week for the whole school year. nice money with it. getting our finances in order. hoping to pay off some bills before the end of the year and my car a year early. and maybe (MAYBE) save enough to hit Disney before mikey turns 10!!

hmmm....

so what is going on in simple life land? let's see.

i have lost 7.4 lbs on WW in 3 weeks! yay me!! still trying to work the program and it gets easier all the time. and i saw a friend from high school at my meeting. pretty cool.

started going back to the gym. should help with the weight loss. started running again today after being stupid sick for 3 or 4 weeks. blech

caleb has finished his behind the wheel driving and is getting his permit this week. (pray for me) actually i have been letting him drive in the neighborhood and he is doing a great job! very proud of him. he just bought a pedal for his guitar. he is loud. that's all i can say!

mikey is more mikey than ever. just such a wonderful spirit and so easy going. you never really have to worry about him. unless he is walking out over a pool cover to step on the ice. yikes!

life groups started at church and i joined 2! wednesday with miranda confessions of a good Christian girl and thursday with jared and kip about the book of mark. the first group is all women and it's gonna be tough. really makes you think about the things you hide from others. and i have lots hidden. and i don't want to share. so i'm scared. the other one is a huge group which i like b/c there are lots of people in there i don't know. (which is weird since i have been going to NLC for over 4 years) but i'm looking forward to getting to know them all.

charlotte has been experiencing AMAZING weather this week. i'm in shorts right now with the windows open. in february! very exciting! however i'm hoping we do get some more winter before spring hits.

michael has some work and hopefully will be getting more as people get their tax returns. (pray for that)

so life is good. just not super exciting. and i'm ok with that!!

what a day!

usually when someone says "what a day" it's bad. right? well not today friends!! it's been a great day and it's only 3:00. i girded my loins and made the commitment to get myself healthy. i went to weight watchers and joined up! i have done WW before and even been a life time member. then mikey came along. not that i regret that one little bit! but i never was able to get back to where i wanted to be weight wise. so i'm doin' it now!!!! i have been very inspired by some of my friends who have lots lots of weight. i just have to bite the bullet and do it!

AND to make the day even better... i just found out that some friends of mine, whom i have been praying for for a veryyyy lonnngggg time, are PREGNANT!!!!! not just one set of friends, but TWO!!! i cried and cried. still a little bit shaky about the whole thing. that makes a total of 8 new babies that will be arriving in 2011 at next level church. there may be more i don't know about so i'll keep you updated. starting in march/april running thru aug/sept, the fun is on!!!! if you can't be pregnant yourself, having friends who are is the next best thing!! (not that i want to be pregnant but there is always a little part of me that would love to have had more kids) michael has informed me not to drink the water or the coffee at church. good thing i bring my own!

(well i spoke too soon! i plugged in my phone to get some pix from it and it wiped the whole thing out!! so enjoy these pix b/c i'm in for a long night of re-learning my blackberry!)

so yesterday at co-op our picture we were studying was by pieter bruegel the elder called children's games. our wonderful parent Aims went to a lot of trouble to have many of the games depicted in the picture at co-op for the kids to play with. it was AWESOME!!! she had them all layed out in the gym and just let them play. they had a fantastic time! here is the original.

and here is what she had for us...

she had hoops and sticks...





tug of war...



potato sack races, broom ball, stacking cups, blocks, marbles, dice and more. mikey actually said "thanks so much ms aims! i had a great time and learned to win at dice!" hahaha!





it was a super great day and those kids will never ever forget that picture or artist! :)


i ♥ homeschooling!

t's cheese stick

i felt very encouraged today by reading my friend teresa's blog over at t's turn. she had something odd but not over the top odd happen to her and she blogged about it. i think my problem with my blog is i feel like i have to have something exciting to write about or it's not worth it. so i'm taking a page from teresa and blogging about not much.

making caleb do school work is like pulling teeth. he's in his room with all his musical instruments and when he is supposed to be writting a paper or something i'll hear the sound of a ukulele coming from behind closed doors. i have kind of let him slide but not anymore! i'm going to be studying his subjects with him so i am sure of what he is getting out of it. i mean i already do it with mikey so i might as well learn more right???

and mikey. that boy. oh i love him so. the things he says make me laugh and laugh. he was playing with his corks (we save everything around here) and he said "this one is my particular favorite. i'm not sure what particular means but it sounds good"!!! and the fact that he plays with corks. come on. imaginative should be his middle name.





we have had some snow. or should i say 2 snows this year. and a birthday. i can't believe caleb is 15! and he had 20 kids at his party. and they were ALL taller than me. it was very very weird.


and here are some random pix of stuff that makes me smile. some of it is from our homeschool co-op which we love!!!